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A wonderfull train journey

Lloyds TSB heading straight down the pan

If by train to shef you adhere

eat no food & drink no beer.

Cos if your arse feels suddenly queer

and a shit you must make disappear

or a piss they charge the same, wots their game.

If at Piccadilly strap up your willy

wot the fucks this 30 pence for a piss

no wonder tramps crap their pants

and water runs down the line

though the weathers fine

so come on you manks and say no thanks

hold in that baby spud as long as you could

or stick it out the train & let shit fall like acid rain.

The Underpant Game is available from most high street retailers

and is a registered product of Nolan Industries Ltd